Hell Is For Readers

April 30, 2021

Because hell, hell is for readers
And you know that our little lives can become such a bore
Hell, hell is for readers
And we shouldn’t have to read this dreck
No realistic teen oriented issues?

No, hell is for readers!

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Centerfold

April 29, 2021

You’re nuts! Mimi isn’t flirting with you, she’s flirting with ME!

Title from J. Geils of course.

My blood runs cold
My memory has just been sold
My Mimi is the centerfold
Mimi is the centerfold

The Waiting

April 24, 2021

Mr. Bookman! My favorite guest character from Seinfeld. His dialog is almost exactly from the show, with a couple of minor obvious changes.

Title from early Tom Petty, of course.

The waiting is the hardest part
Every day this story drags on
You read it on faith, you take it to the heart
The waiting (for a good story) is the hardest part

Eat It

April 23, 2021

Seriously, if that’s supposed to be meat, I’m pretty sure it isn’t supposed to be purple. Unless it is unicorn meat or something. And then Mrs. Burrito breaks out into song:

Don’t wanna argue, I don’t wanna debate
Don’t wanna hear about what kind of food you hate
You won’t get no dessert ’till you clean off your plate
So eat it
Don’t you tell me you’re full

– “Eat It” by Weird Al Yankovic

Legs (I Mean, Necks)

April 21, 2021

She’s got neck, she knows how to use it
Her boyfriend begs, he knows how to bite it
Her dad will whine, all of the time
Just grunts at Zane, at library time
Oh, we want her, said, we got to have her
The girl is not CK, she’s alright (oh)

– Apologies to ZZ Top and their smash hit, Legs.

Double Vision

April 20, 2021

Well, looks like Andy Capp got to Marty after all. So much for being on the wagon. I’m guessing it’s pretty bad, as I assume Marty must have puked all over his original outfit last inning. He started the game wearing green, and now he’s in blue.

Today’s title comes from Foreigner’s album and single.